MASSACHUSETTS - Whether you are traveling up from Connecticut, crossing the border from New York, or driving down from New Hampshire, you will quickly discover that Massachusetts is home to some incredibly bizarre and surprisingly "raunchy" town names. While the Bay State is famous for its deep Revolutionary War history, legendary sports franchises, and world-class universities, whoever was in charge of naming its local municipalities clearly left behind a legacy of unintentional humor.
From hilarious double entendres to accidentally inappropriate-sounding colonial names, here is a look at the most unusual, head-scratching, and raunchy-sounding town names you will find scattered across Massachusetts.
1. Cummington (Hampshire County)
You simply cannot discuss ridiculously named New England geography without starting with Cummington. Located in the beautiful rolling hills of Hampshire County, this town features a name that immediately draws giggles from teenagers and sounds like a highly inappropriate, internet-age joke. Despite the guaranteed double-takes from out-of-town drivers, the town's history is completely respectable. Incorporated in 1779, it was proudly named in honor of Colonel John Cummings, a prominent early landowner and speculator who helped organize the original settlement. Today, it remains a quiet, incredibly scenic agricultural town, entirely oblivious to modern slang.
2. Belchertown (Hampshire County)
Just down the road in Hampshire County, you will find Belchertown, a municipality with a name that sounds exactly like a crude bodily function or a terrible fictional town from a children's cartoon. While the name inevitably draws a smirk from those with a middle-school sense of humor, the town's actual origin is strictly political. Established in the 18th century, it was named to honor Jonathan Belcher, a prominent and highly respected royal governor of the Province of Massachusetts Bay. The dignified intention resulted in a permanently hilarious map designation.
3. Athol (Worcester County)
Much like its identically named sister town in New York, the town of Athol in Worcester County is famous for being the butt of local jokes. When spoken out loud—especially with a slight lisp or a heavy Boston accent—the name sounds uncomfortably identical to a very common, highly aggressive curse word. The origin, however, has absolutely nothing to do with foul language. The town was named in the 1760s by Colonel John Murray, who chose the moniker to honor James Murray, the second Duke of Atholl in Scotland.
4. Assonet (Bristol County)
Located in Bristol County, Assonet is a historic village within the town of Freetown. Its name immediately raises eyebrows, as it sounds uncomfortably like a crude anatomical joke or a bizarre internet network dedicated to rear ends. The reality of its naming, however, is a fascinating and beautiful piece of indigenous history. The name is derived from the local Wampanoag Native American language, roughly translating to "place of the rocks" or "song of the stones." Today, it is a fiercely historic and scenic waterfront community that happily embraces its unique Native American moniker.
5. Braintree (Norfolk County)
While not exactly "raunchy," no list of bizarre Massachusetts municipalities is complete without Braintree. Located in Norfolk County, the name sounds less like a city and more like a terrifying, anatomical sci-fi horror concept or an incredibly strange botanical mutation. Despite the bizarre mental imagery the name conjures, its roots are deeply historic and entirely unoriginal. Incorporated in 1640, early English colonists simply named the settlement after the historic town of Braintree located in Essex, England. It is famously the birthplace of two U.S. Presidents (John Adams and John Quincy Adams), proving that you can achieve absolute greatness even if your hometown sounds incredibly weird.
